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Episode 7 | June 7, 2022

Because This Takes Practice

Heather Drago and Sarah Saunders touch base mid-season on their current boundary struggles and continued efforts to say 'no'.


Welcome to “That’s a Hard No” – the podcast about saying no and setting boundaries so you can become the authentic and empowered you that this world needs.

Reminder: While Sarah is a Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor, this podcast is in no way replacement for one-on-one therapy with a mental health professionalIf you are struggling with mental health issues, we welcome you on this journey, but also invite you to seek out professional help.

Looking for a therapist? Here’s a good place to start:

Key Takeaways

As our host, licensed clinical counselor Sarah Saunders, always says…”This is a muscle and we have to keep exercising it.”

  • We are human- We do not know all and we continue to need practice, exercise, and check-ins.
  • Reflection – Taking a moment to be real and honest. Practicing what we are preaching!
  • Coexisting emotions – gratitude and exhaustion or fear can be felt together. Allowing yourself to understand it is okay to take in negative feelings with positive feelings. Similarly, energy and exhaustion can live in the same moment too.
  • A moment of breathwork – taking a minute to release some of our tightness and stress.
  • Goals and healthy practices – Micro goals and daily goals are powerful. Having small but important things to check off each day can help manage and identify what is valuable and/or vital to you.
    • Fear driving – “Ships in harbor are safe but that’s not what ships are for.”
      • The realization that what you want and need are what you are made for. Trusting your gut.
  • How Am I Spending My Day? – Set intentions but also find ways to track what you have done today. It can be as simple or silly as “Did I laugh today?” or “Did I hug my littles today?”
    • This allows you to think back to the day and checking in with your tasks and needs being met.
  • Saying No Without an External Force – The pandemic created an environment that ‘no’ became easier, we had an external force that allowed us to have a reason bigger than our control.
    • We need to relearn to set our boundaries without excuses.
  • Priorities – Saying ‘no’ to plans, work, and other is difficult, however finding what is a priority to you can make decisions easier.
    • Making sure you are high on that list. As parents and friends and partners we can feel pulled in a million different directions. Schedule moments for yourself or one on one time with others or family members.
    • Being a helper is a beautiful characteristic but it is important to spend the day for yourself and the people within your home. Try to recognize your limits.
Resources & Recommendations
  • Books
    • Feel The Fear and Do It Anyway, by Susan Jeffers, PhD – Read about ways to stop feeling the ‘yes’ pressures, turning fear, indecision and anger into power, action, and love. (link to Amazon)
Credits and Thanks