Boundaries & Consent

Our Guests

• Ohio Alliance to End Sexual Violence (OAESV) – serves as Ohio’s rape crisis coalition. We provide the main training and technical assistance for rape crisis centers.
• Taylr Ucker- Lauderman(she/her), Chief Officer of Communications & Engagement at OAESV
• Caitlin Burke (she/her), Director of Prevention & Public Health at OAESV

Key Takeaways

• Boundaries and consent go hand-in-hand. It’s not just about setting boundaries but also receiving them. We have to respect others’ boundaries and we expect others to respect ours.
• Establishing Consent & Conversations – How do we breach these topics? When should we have them?
  • Prevention programs often work with young people, starting early is best case scenario. This does not have to be about intimacy, but about our bodies, space, and needs.
  • Value in starting early on and finding age-appropriate materials that can help communicate about boundaries and what consent means
  • Breaching the topic should be prioritized by an adult and discussing before it becomes a conversation since something did happen
• Warning Signs and How To Respond
  • Bullying/Cyberbullying – Many anti-bullying campaigns, but recognizing this in your own children as well
  • Violence in General –
    • Our society often has ways that some small behaviors are ignored. Our policies and judicial/medical/corporate systems all allow a space for these minor biases that can lead to sexual violence. Sexist behaviors, racially fueled ‘jokes’, etc.
    • Being ‘nice’ or staying quiet creates a dangerous environment.
• Standing Firm (and the Reality that Follows) – Unfortunately, sometimes standing firm in our boundaries does cause backlash. Asserting boundaries especially as a marginalized person may result in something negative happening.
  • If the ability to assert boundaries isn’t available, to give yourself grace to find ways to begin recovery.
  • Practice saying things out loud – saying no, using the proper terminology for body parts
• Policies – While it’s extremely valuable to be a a supportive and safe adult, enviornment is extremely important.
  • We need to be supported by schools, government, workplaces.
    • Where do students/employees go when they need help?
    • How will they get the care and time off they need?
• Supporting the Aftermath – Listen. If someone has the courage to speak with you about something that happened to them, feel honored.
  • Don’t question what happened, but can ask “How can I support you?”
  • Trauma can cause some confusion, just believe them
  • Don’t pretend to understand
  • Have a basic understanding of where to access support
• Future Action – To take an anti-oppression approach to the future. Taking away the societal expectations for people due to their gender, sexuality, race or otherwise.
  • Actively practicing and reevaluating your personal boundaries. It is a learned skill that needs to continue to be exercised.

Where to Find the Ohio Alliance to End Sexual Violence

• Website – oaesv.org
• Instagram – @oaesv
• Facebook – Ohio Alliance to End Sexual Violence

Credits and Thanks

• Many thanks to our friends and families (our “villagers”) for listening, and for your continued support.
• That’s a Hard No is a joint production of Clever Girl Marketing and Purposeful Growth & Wellness.
• Marketing and Production Coordinator, Maura Del Rosario.
• Production Support, Evergreen Podcasts, Noah Foutz, Producer.
• Music: “Whiskey for Lunch” by GG Rigs.