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Episode 46 | December 5, 2023

Jo Peters, an experienced leader, coach, and author shares her insights on how to have it all without doing it all and emphasizes the importance of inner work in living the life of our dreams.

Listen in as Jo Peters talks healthy boundaries, gaining confidence, inner work and creating the life you love.

INTRO

Welcome to “That’s a Hard No”the podcast about learning to say no and set boundaries to live our best lives. 

Follow along with me as we learn from fellow strugglers and experts, so that you too can start saying no without feeling fear, guilt, or FOMO. 

 

SHOW NOTES
Jo Peters, an experienced leader, coach, and author, talks gaining confidence, doing your inner work, avoiding burnout and how to have it all. Listen in as we discuss struggling to set boundaries, how they can provide space and joy in your life as well as prioritizing yourself and your needs. Allow yourself to feel.
Key Takeaways
[00:06:08] Struggling to set boundaries

  • Overcoming ‘good girl’ syndrome
  • Year of no
  • Breaking people pleasing tendencies
  • Being compassionate with yourself
  • Sometimes our thoughts are worse than the what may logically happen

“Boundaries are the place where I can love you and still love myself.”

[00:09:29] Gaining confidence & Doing Inner Work

  • Practice the “saying no” muscle
  • Start small – not giving an explanation
  • Owning your own feelings, but being honest
    • Stand up and ask for what you want
  • Where do we learn that what I need to say yes to be loved, or I need to caretake to be loved

[00:13:06] Having it all without burnout

  • Showing up for yourself and then showing up for others
  • Ripple effect amongst all the items in your life and into others in your life
  • Allow your cup to overflow to be able to give excess
  • Find the wisdom you have inside of you – that you know there is another way to do things

“And then when you change the order and then you start doing it first for you and then you start showing up in the world from a place of saying enough no’s to others that you have yeses for yourself and your tank is full, then you start having it all in your health because you have the energy in your relationships because you are showing up like your true self in your finances and your money.”

[00:17:38] Understanding boundaries and inner child

  • What makes you feel so afraid?
  • Write things down to get goals as well as fears outside of ourselves
  • Be curious instead of judgmental

[00:22:08] Documenting progress and success

  • We often forget our progress
  • Remember to look back and see how far you have come
  • Tracking and analyzing, important to have someone to support you along the process
  • Find patterns and utilize the ones that are continuing to work
  • Process what is reality – look in the mirror

“I think we do discount or forget all the things we’ve accomplished over time.”

[00:28:34] Feelings as moral neutrality

  • Feelings are just feelings
  • Our feelings are data, read into them and register what that means
  • They are all part of your survival signal
  • Feelings and emotions are different
    • Feelings are neutral, a message
    • Emotions are the lasting feelings

“I am known as Joe Unicorn Coach because I believe that we all have magic inside of us and are unicorns, but I believe that with society, BS, we forgot about it and we forgot about our horn and we start behaving like regular horses.”

Where to Find Jo
Credits and Thanks
  • Many thanks to our friends and families (our “villagers”) for listening, and for your continued support.
  • That’s a Hard No is a production of Clever Girl Marketing
  • Marketing and Production Coordinator, Maura Del Rosario
  • Production Support, Evergreen Podcasts, Noah Foutz, Producer
  • New Rock Anthem Music: Written by Noah, and performed by his band, The Big Leagues
  • Videographer, Kae Holmberg